Friday, August 30, 2013

10 Other Bands Who Should Reunite at the VMAs

The other night, MTV hosted their annual VMA's, and it was kind of a disaster.  I could go on and on about how hypocritical MTV is hosting an awards ceremony for the music videos that they no longer show anymore, or how Billy Ray Cyrus had a worse night than anyone on this planet, or how bored Rihanna looked when the attention wasn't on her.  I am here to discuss the reunion of *NSYNC, which was a very hyped 30 seconds during a 15 minute Justin Timberlake set.  I'm indifferent about *NSYNC.  They annoyed me when I was in the 3rd grade because girls (they had cooties back then) wouldn't shut the hell up about those guys and the Backstreet Boys.  As time marched on, I gained respect for Justin Timberlake.  Mostly from his appearance on Saturday Night Live, but also his music isn't that bad.  Good for that guy.  Anyways, I started thinking what other bands/acts should have reunited at the VMA's instead of *NSYNC's 30 second cameo that was about 11 years in the making.  Before I start, I'm clarifying that I'm only doing possible reunions, so no Nirvana, Doors, etc. Also, I'm not counting groups who came back or broke up recently.  I mean, I'd love to include No Doubt on this list but they kinda came back last year with an album that supposedly came out, so I'm sorry Gwen but you won't make the cut. Without further rambling, I give you my top 10 bands who should also have reunited at the VMA's.

10. Limp Bizkit- I kind of miss Fred Durst.  I wonder what that guy is up to.  At one point, he was famous for wearing a backwards red baseball cap and got Ben Stiller to make appearances in Limp Bizkit's music videos.  What the hell happened?  These guys were angry and managed to make a few good albums songs in the late 90's early 00's.  I learned a lot of colorful language from Fred Durst and co. as a youngin' and always kind of found them entertaining.  This being said, even as a semi-closeted fan, I would never go to a Limp Bizkit out of fear of my health/safety and fear of my reputation being forever tarnished.  This being said, when it comes to a trash heap of an awards show who likes controversial appearances, give me Limp Bizkit any day.  Maybe that feud between Carson Daly and Fred Durst concerning Christina Aguilera can come back into play.  Keep on rollin'.

9. O-Town- There is no possible way that time has been kind to these guys.  I hated these guys mostly because the blonde dude's name was like Ashley Angel or something.  What a dweeb.  This guy should have been beat up in high school, not being a pop-star making money (probably all of which is gone now).  I have absolutely no idea if these guys were talented or not, because all I remember was looking at them and thinking they were pansies.  I can't name you a single song by these idiots but they would certainly represent MTV as former TRL darlings that really capitalized on their momentum.
a turtleneck?  C'mon man.

8. Gorillaz- Real wildcard here.  The Gorillaz are on a hiatus and such, and have hits to draw attention and make people miss them.  The VMA's might be the perfect chance to showcase a cartoon band on national television.  Basically it's like watching cartoons while listening to good music, which is a lot of people kinda do today unfortunately.  It's like an awesome version of Josie and the Pussycats at an awards show.  I'll take a cartoon concert over Katy Perry boxing/singing on a bridge to close out the VMA's any day.

7. Weezer- I know, I know.  They technically can't reunite because they're not broken up, but let's face it, they basically should have instead of the the garbage they have put out the past 8 years.  Seriously.  Their album 'Make Believe' (you know, the one with 'Beverly Hills' and 'Perfect Situation') came out in 2005.  They put out 4 albums since that, in a span from 2008-2010, and even as a Weezer fan, I cannot name you one song from any of those albums besides that annoying 'Pork and Beans' song and that song called something like 'if you're wondering about him wondering if you want me to or if you want me to' GOD I'M CONFUSED.  Anyways, the point is, Weezer has been pretty awful in the past 7ish years, and this is coming from a guy who really likes Weezer.  It's been a long time since Island in the Sun and even longer since the days of Buddy Holly and The Sweater Song came out.  Weezer is a band with a bunch of hits, but the time off is much needed, and they can comeback at the VMA's, play some of their greatest hits, and everyone will be happy.

6. Vanessa Carlton- Who doesn't love Vanessa Carlton?  Honestly I have no idea, for all I know she could be still touring and releasing new music, but I'm not googling it.  I felt foolish enough having 'White Houses' and 'Thousand Miles' show up on my Spotify for all 14 of my followers to see.  I like Vanessa Carlton.  She always had that look where she looked wholesome but kind of miserable.  It was very I-hate-this-shit-but-I-have-to-look-adorable.  I also want to point out that both 'White Houses' and 'Thousand Miles' are songs that most guys know and love.  You can really tell a guys comfort level with himself as a man if he admits to liking Vanessa Carlton.  Show me a man who claims to not like Vanessa Carlton and I will show you a liar.  What better place for Vanessa Carlton to make her triumphant return to the lime light than the VMA's.  I bet she wouldn't even have to twerk on her piano to wow the crowd.
I'd walk a thousand miles for you, bb.

5. Rage Against The Machine-  Speaking of Vanessa Carlton, another similar act who should get their shit together and just play music at the VMA's is Rage Against the Machine.  It doesn't make sense why these guys are still on a break/split.  You have a band who people would kill to see live or get new music from, and they just can't get their act together.  When people bring up the whole Rap Rock genre of the late 90's and 00's, it usually gets a lot of head shaking and eye rolls, but there was one band who stood out and was legit, and is still favorable today, and that is Rage.  If the VMA's ever want a head banging performance that will get people talking, as long as they keep it a secret until it happens, Rage Against the Machine would be perfect.  I know that I'd personally be pumped to see Bulls On Parade or Guerilla Radio live on TV.  I'm really pulling for this to happen.  This would help me forgive MTV for sucking the past 13 years.  By the way, for anyone who loved the game Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2 you might wanna watch the video below. Kinda intense.

4. Guns N Roses- This may be a no chance in hell sort of thing, but it would have people talking.  Axl Rose and Slash playing together again for the first time in around 20 years, putting the hatred and lawsuits and history aside, all for Music Television.  Sigh.  I realize that Guns N Roses are technically touring still, but that's only Axl Rose and a bunch of random dudes he picked up off the street- it's just not the same.  It's like Diet Guns N Roses.  They should be called Bullet N Petals at this point if you ask me.  I'm taking the original lineup any day.  Their first album, Appetite for Destruction gave us 'Paradise City', 'Welcome to the Jungle' and 'Sweet Child O' Mine', which are all favorites on today's karaoke scene.  On a side note: it makes no sense how none of these guys are dead yet.  This is seriously one band that should have like 3 out of the 5 dead from drugs or alcohol or something, but somehow they have made it this far.  This gives even better reason to celebrate by letting bygones be bygones and performing at the VMA's! I'll tell you, there would be plenty of cougars out there who would start getting hot flashes while watching the VMA's with their kids if GNR came out and shocked the world.  The problem here is that Guns N Roses getting back together has an unlikelier chance of happening than Khloe Kardashian looking good in a bikini.  It ain't gonna happen.  Let's put it this way: if Guns N Roses couldn't reunite at their own Rock N Roll hall of fame induction, then they probably won't reunite for the VMA's which, let's face it, really aren't as important as they used to be.  This would be great to see, but we gotta believe it won't happen.
The 80's were weird.
3. The Smiths- Hospitals across the world would be slammed by an influx of hipsters having heart palpitations if The Smiths were to reunite at the VMA's. The Smiths had everything going for them 25+ years ago and just quit during their prime.  They are one of those "what if....?" bands where it is truly a shame that they couldn't put their differences aside for the sake of good music.  Morrissey has gone on to have a successful solo career, but it's jut not the same.  Of course, if this were to take place, there would be millions of random people who never heard of The Smiths and then hop on the bandwagon real quick, which would annoy the masses of Smiths fans already in existence.  All the possible fake fans aside, it would be amazing to have it happen, although the chances of it are slim to none.  Proof?  Morrissey is quoted as saying "I would rather eat my own testicles than reform The Smiths, and that's saying something for a vegetarian".  Kinda graphic, kinda concerning, but really sums up the odds of The Smiths coming back.  Also, they were rumored to be offered $75 million to do one tour and turned it down, so playing the VMA's might be unlikely if they were to miraculously reunite.  NOTE: watch this video below.  I think the two guys dancing in the crowd throughout the video were the creators of Molly.

2. Outkast- Hey ya!  Out of all of these, it may be the most realistic to happen.  I'm not the biggest fan of hip hop, I will certainly admit, but I always liked and admired Outkast.  These guys were good.  I still remember being awkward in the 6th grade, wearing some Marc Ecko shirt and listening to Ms. Jackson a couple of times a day to help build some cred with my new urbanized classmates.  MTV loved Outkast, and rightly so.  Outkast was another group who went out while in their primes.  Hey Ya! and Roses came out and lasted a long time, only to have Outkast kind of fade off into the sunset with that being their last album.  They have had their time off now and did their respective solo work, and it may be time to have a comeback.   Another interesting thing to see would be Andre 3000's wardrobe for the VMA's.  That's a man who knows how to dress.  Outkast would be a homerun for surprise performances.  You don't meet too many people who don't like Outkast.  Everyone wins.  They should play this years Super Bowl in my opinion.  Beats the hell out of the Black Eyed Peas.

1. Creed- Just kidding.  Although it would we be painful to watch these guys reunite, we could all still agree that although they are bad, Nickelback still sucks more than they do.
this is the worst picture I have/will ever put on my blog

1.  The White Stripes-  This was one breakup that made me lose faith in humanity for a short period of time.  It really was amazing that this band, consisting of two people, who claimed to be brother and sister but turned out to actually be married and divorced, made such great music in their time.  Every album they put out was awesome, and they kinda shocked the world when they announced they were calling it quits.  I have the utmost respect for Jack White, who over the years has become one of the best musicians on the planet, and always stood up for Meg verbally, like shooting down critics of her drumming, or physically, like when he punched the lead singer of the Von Bondies in the face for making some negative comment about her.  The White Stripes were sort of weird, but definitely brilliant.  7 Nation Army is going to be one of those songs that will still be played at sports arenas 50 years from now, and it would be tremendous to have them get back together at the VMA's.  Who knows the possibility of this happening.  I guess will have to just wait and see.  And maybe pray.

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