Sunday, July 24, 2016

Celebrity Smackdown: Kim K SuperStar vs. Taylor "Meh" Swift

I was not intending to write this blog until this morning. This is more of an emergency blog which I had to write. Strike while the iron is hot right? When big pop culture news occurs, I just got to get involved. I'll still have the Ultimate Karaoke Blog coming up this week but for now, let's talk about something unimportant.

This past week was a rough one for America's sweetheart/victim Taylor Swift. If you haven't heard, which I think is impossible because it's been all over the place even though there are some much more pressing matters going on in the world, Taylor Swift got put on blast by America's favorite Star Without a Talent Kim Kardashian. Basically Kanye West called T. Swifty for permission to use her name in a song that Taylor Swift later claimed she never did and that she was a victim once again. Once the video of the conversation, posted on Snapchat of all things, hit the interwebs, people everywhere realized that Taylor Swift is just a liar. I knew she was trouble when she walked in.

My feelings about this are very mixed.

YAAAAS Let the games begin!!!!!

If you were to ask me who I hate more between Taylor Swift and Kim Kardashian, I'd have to ask for a week to ponder it, which would result in many sleepless nights and a lot of stress. It boggles my mind that Kim Kardashian is famous for being the daughter of OJ Simpson's 3rd best lawyer and Satan herself Kris Kardashian, whose fame grew after being Paris Hilton's friend and filming a sex tape with R&B legend Brandy's little brother Ray J. Now she is married to Kanye West and millions of people watch her and her stupid family on a reality show where they showcase their lavish lifestyle that they don't deserve. It also boggles my mind that Taylor Swift is as big as she is, which makes me weep at the fact that most of America has terrible taste in music. Taylor Swift played the whole clutzy girl everyone can relate to, with real deep songs like 'Mean', which is about a boy that is mean to her...I'm guessing? Sure, 'Love Story' was a catchy little number that made everyone sing-a-long and drunkenly cry to at bars when I was a college freshman, but besides that I have no use for her. She wanted to be a country singing girl next door who is now a pop singer who seems more robot than human these days, yet trying to still be a girl who other girls should look up to.


Now that we have Kim K Superstar calling out Taylor Swift, I don't know what to do. In one way I'm thankful for Kim doing this because it ruins Swift's reputation. To be honest, I think this is the most productive thing Kim Kardashian has ever done in her career as a... umm.... a.... whatever it is that she technically does. I never want to give Kim K credit, but I actually have to right now. What really intrigues me is the lack of support from T Swift's millions and millions of fan girls, and bros who adore her for whatever reason. All my friends I've asked about seem to have nothing to say because they know she's screwed more than Kim Kardashian in that tape with....well, you get it. Taylor Swift fans are reeling right now and may find it difficult to Shake It Off (had that joke saved up all day). Their relatable savior has now been tarnished, and who knows how she'll come back. At this point, I don't think she'll ever ever ever, get back to being as big of a star as she once was.

"oh boo hoo ppl know I'm a fraud"

Where T. Swifty goes next will be interesting. As much as I hate both her and the Kardashian clan being in the news, I'd gladly welcome Swift suing Kim K and Kanye for posting the video, which I think she has a good chance to do, since she seems to threaten to sue everyone trying to make a dollar off of her (shoutout to all you people on Etsy). A Taylor Swift v. Kardashian lawsuit would be fantastic, because we if she wins the suit it means that the world gets a tarnished Swift and a Kardashian losing money and facing legal ramifications. We all win! The only thing that is a shame about this fiasco is that beloved claymation show Celebrity Deathmatch is no longer on television. This would be like the main event match on a Pay-Per-View worthy episode. They could bill it as the Celebs We Worship For No Reason Death Match.

Who Could Forget The Epic Battle of The Spice Girls vs. Hanson 

In the end, this wont affect many of our lives in a big way. I just love to see Taylor Swift getting called out for once. Every relationship she's ever had it's always woe is me boo-hoo all guys are jerks. Hey, maybe you're the problem Taylor.  Maybe you're just that boring and/or fake that people that know you closely can't stand you. It was never your fault and you had no problem telling the world you were the one who was wounded. Yet look at her now, breaking poor Calvin Harris's heart, but not before using the alias Nils Sjöberg as a song writer on his song 'This Is What You Came For' because she didn't want to be associated with it. How nice of her.  I can't wait until her next album is about how she was so sad about the Calvin Harris situation, and probably the Tom Hiddlestone situation in about another month, because you know that is doomed. 

She looks like a Nils
Maybe the fame has gone to her head and this is a big reality check for her, courtesy of a mind-numbingly snobby reality diva. For once, I'm looking on the bright side of this and considering it a win-win situation. I'm not expecting Taylor Swift to fade into oblivion, but the fact that her fans are wiping their tears with their white flags tells you that the sparkly shine of Taylor Swift's aura has grown a bit dull after this week. I'm gonna root for her in the probable lawsuit so Kim K can lose something too, and with that, everyone wins...well, besides all the Kim K and T Swift fans out there, so I guess only a few people win, but boy does it feel good to be one of those people. 

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